Is it because i listened to Nawaz Deobandi`s poem last night. I do not know why?
Tere Ane ki jab khabar meheke,
Tere khushbu se sara ghar meheke!
When news came of your entrance,
With your fragrance, all the house was touched !
But last night (obviously in the dream) i was a la gare du nord. Depressed and tired, i was outside of myself and had a view of myself. I was lost and negative. I could see it on my face. Then again an SUV stopped, like a sort of Taxi Train that they use to have at the bustop where everyone gets in and share the cost. To my surprise i was also given a view on the inside of the van. The driver (recognizably my mystical teacher - please do not ask who it is (Allah, Jesus, Nanak?) was the driver, and he immediately raised his voice when the negative Rattan (let us call him X) tried to get in. In the van were other incarnations of myself all jovial all happy all excited, but X was refused entranced. He was told by the driver that you are way too negative, too irritated. "You cannot come on this journey, ", "I will not give you a ride Patron".
And there i was, left abandoned to myself in the cold night winds of Port Louis. The winds that hit from across the harbor, the cold indian ocean southerly winds. I was without sweater, without nothing, a nothing.
Then the voice, "Now you will have to walk all the way to Quatre Bornes !". (To myself: why QB because i was at The gare du Nord ?).
Moi ki faire. Mais to pas fine ecoute moi, to pas pou capave vine are moi kan to negative.
end of the dream
My take on it:
Quatre Bornes (in the dream) is my final stop in Life. The angel of history only carries us forward when we are eager to learn, when we are true 'assoiffes' of knowledge, and are in love with life, who despite all adversities, keep searching keep looking. He did not take that part of me for a ride because i gave up ! I let go of the stick of inquiry, of the rational mind. I let the devil of madness take me in its arms.
That is why the road will be long. That is why i will have to walk from Port Louis to Quatre Bornes in the cold, in the darkest of all nights...
